TRUTH - Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

And now for the formal part of the Truth Blog which I am sick of . . . and just found out that my husband wished I hadn't started in the first place . . . but I have a follow through issue so now I must finish . . . like how I have to finish reading a book even if I hate it . . . which is probably why I hate reading.

Maturity and Confidence. I know those are two things but I think they are related. I have always been hugely self conscience of my "youngness". I don't know if it comes from being the youngest in my class because of where my birthday falls in the year . . . I don't know. Strangely enough, the majority of the people I choose to be around are older then me which only exacerbates my situation. But it is like a creditability thing for me. I hide my age at work because I don't want people to think that I am too young to be able to the job. But as it turns out people are usually surprised when they find out "how young I am" because they tell me I am mature and confident. Which actually means that people think I am older then what I am . . . which I love!

Now for the break through part . . .

Then I just got to thinking . . . with some help from a great conversation with my sister . . . I am mature and I am confident. Somewhere along this whole mom road I stopped reading baby books and obsessively reading blogs and even listening when doctors disagreed with my approach. I stopped because of a conversation I had with a few of my girlfriends. One of them shared with me that they had the nurses take the baby to the nursery the night they delivered because they weren't confident to be able to care for the baby. They needed the nurses to tell them when the baby needed to eat and needed a fresh diaper. Another said that every time she had to change the diaper or re-swaddle the baby she had to call the nurse in for help because she didn't know or couldn't remember how to do it. Which just shocked me! And I know must be shocking the girlfriends who actually read this blog (who aren't the same girlfriends who I talk to above). All of that came so natural to me and seemed so obvious. The nurses slowed me down and got in my way - I knew how to be a mom. So after that moment it became clear to me that following my instinct was far greater advice then I could read or ask for and maybe that is because of my maturity and confidence. I survived my first 24hours of being a new mom on instinct where some moms apparently couldn't. So just because a doctor tells us that our child is having behavioral challenges doesn't mean I should stop following my instincts. Seems so obvious but I guess it is good to reflect every now and again to remind yourself what makes you great.

Sleeping Update

The Ferber method worked for us when we felt it was time for Petie to sleep through the night. So we decided to implement it again tonight for bedtime. Petie cried for 5min (which is why I started writing this blog to distract myself) and then I went upstairs and held my baby and soothed him and kissed him and told him I loved him and left the room. He cried again. He cried for 9min - and yes I watched the clock out of the corner of my eye while writing this blog. And then he stopped. He has been asleep for 37min. Which is longer then he would sleep by himself last night. It wasn't easy but I feel satisfied and in control and feel like my little guy feels loved and that is all I need. The night is still young which means I had better stop typing and start making my lunch for tomorrow so I can go try to catch some sleep before who knows what happens.